Monday, December 22, 2008
This is the time of Forgiveness!
Many people feel that this time of year is a good time to be forgiving. There is no special time of year that is specially suited to forgiveness. You should practice forgiveness throughout your year and throughout your life! Forgiving someone for some real or imagined infraction against you does more for you than it ever does for them. To forgive someone is to put whatever it may be, into the past. Let go of the negative emotions it elicits in you. Release the anger, frustration, and any other unhappy emotions that it brings out in you. Forgiving someone however does not mean forgetting or making everything return to normal. You can forgive a person for stealing from you, but if they are still stealing, I would not recommend leaving them alone in your house. Forgiving does not mean becoming incautious or stupid. A drug user who has quit drugs for 3 weeks is to be applauded for his efforts and encouraged to continue. You can forgive them for their past transgressions. Do not however think that the behaviour is over or done for good. You do not have to welcome them back into the fold to forgive them. It took them time to destroy the relationship, it will take just as long to put things right. Too many people want immediate gratification. It takes time to heal. It takes time to build or rebuild trust. Be forgiving and let the negative emotions leave your life and end your frustration. Be smart and be cautious though by not enabling future bad behaviour and protect yourself from future problems with them. Do not be so hopeful that you allow them back into your life too quickly, they must earn that. That is not part of forgiving. Forgiving means letting it go, but not forgetting about it and not permitting it to happen again.